kersen | Angelique

Angelique

After the night of his trial, Kersen had texted Angelique to let her know that he was okay, but that she might not hear from him for a bit. He waited until he felt a little more under control, at least enough that he thought he could carry on a conversation without lapsing into a gooey pile of guilt.

When he got back in touch, he asked if she'd like to meet him somewhere, or if she'd like to come by the bar. She'd chosen the latter, and he was glad. There were multiple reasons why having the opportunity for privacy with her might be good. Not least of which being the conversation they were going to have to have, about vampires.

He was a little closer (though nowhere there yet) to his usual sparkly self tonight. Wearing leather trousers and a black shirt emblazoned with a swirling rose. He was behind the bar, mostly pouring wine.

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Angelique enjoyed this, being close to someone she liked and trusted as she did Kersen. With her feet tucked up beneath her, she was half on his lap, but no one seemed to mind. "I like to think the outside only now matches what I've always been inside," she prefaced with a small, reminiscent smile. "But it's only been... oh, three years. I finished school when I was almost seventeen, and I came to the city right away. I invented Angelique, and this has been me ever since."

Kersen nodded, understanding some of it, at least. "I left home when I was fifteen," he said. "Disowned, really. Begged for work on an East India Company ship bound for Europe. Not a particularly glamorous time in my life."

"I suppose you could say I was lured away from home, but I went into it with my eyes open. Anything was better than where I was living. How I was living," she sighed quietly.

"Is that where you were from originally? India?" Angelique asked, curious but not insistent if Kersen seemed unwilling to speak of it.

Kersen shook his head. "Indonesia. Called the East Indies then, though. While it was still occupied by the Dutch. My father was Dutch though I don't remember him much, he went home when I was very young. And... as soon as it was clear enough that I was attracted to men, that was no longer a good place for me to be, either."

He paused for only a moment, and decided he should tell her the rest, given the revelations she'd made. "I found myself at fifteen on the streets of Paris. You might say I fell into the same line of work as you."

This was exactly what Angelique had wanted: the real Kersen, the person he was beyond his vampirism, his essential self. Her breath caught in surprise at that last admission. "You did? You... oh, fifteen is much too young," she sighed quietly, giving him a little squeeze about the shoulders.

Kersen offered her a small, reassuring smile, and reminded her, "This was the early seventeenth century. It was older, then. And... it wasn't so bad, at least not nearly what it could have been. And it happened due to the first in what would become a pattern of falling in love with much older men who found me easily malleable." It felt like so long ago, when he spoke of it. "When I tried to leave, it was a problem, but... I did. Leave. And by then I was a lot wiser. That's when I came to London the first time."

It was new information to Angelique, but of course for Kersen it had happened hundreds of years ago. She nodded, understanding almost too well. "I thought I was in love, when I came to London. As it turns out, I... was more in love with the thought of being in love. At least I was never posing on the street corner waiting for some car to stop. I've never been in danger, really. I'm careful to screen out those who don't understand what they'll be finding under my skirt," she added with a wry little smile.

Kersen, on the other hand, had certainly been roughed up a time or two at that time in his life. And worse, before he'd become a vampire.

"I can't help but worry about you," he confessed. "But... I know that you can take care of yourself."

Angelique touched his cheek lightly, with a tiny smile. "While I don't really want you to worry, I... have to confess, it's nice. Knowing someone out there is concerned about me. I've always been on my own."

"I've spent a lot of time alone myself," Kersen confessed. "But yes, I'm here for you if you need me." Including that he felt like he'd rip the head off of anyone who heard her. Potentially literally, depending on how badly they hurt her.

"If you ever start feeling lonely, you can call me," Angelique promised him. "Sometimes, when you're part of... a certain world, it can be a relief to have friends who are outside of it. If I had to spend all of my time around the other working boys and girls at the house, I'd go absolutely mad."

"The extent to which I feel part of the vampire world is pretty limited," Kersen admitted. "That's been one of my problems, actually. But I agree with the sentiment."

Angelique actually looked a little relieved that Kersen wasn't particularly close to other vampires. Though... that would be different now, with the girl, wouldn't it? She leaned against his shoulder, comfortable against him. "Neither of us quite fit it, do we?" Angelique mused quietly.

"Definitely not," Kersen confirmed. He tipped his head down and kissed the top of her hair. She smelled amazing, and he could hear her quiet heartbeat.

Angelique smiled to herself, but thought she could feel some hesitation in him. She lifted her head again, tilting up her chin to look at him thoughtfully. "Kersen, is there something else the matter?"

Kersen was immediately a bit embarrassed that she'd noticed. "No," he said gently. "Not at all. It's only that you smell amazing."

"Well, I do my best," Angelique began, amused at first. "You have a preference for drugstore shampoo?"

Kersen's smile turned a little sheepish. "Not that scent, beautiful."

After half a heartbeat, Angelique blinked, and understood. Unconsciously, one hand crept up to her throat, just beneath the fold of the white collar of her shirt. She remembered the fangs Kersen had shown her. "I didn't realize you could..." Smell her. It felt too dangerous to say those words.

"Is it difficult for you?" Angelique asked more quietly. "That is, do you want to... ?"

"No," Kersen said immediately. But then corrected himself, "I mean, of course I'd like... but no, it isn't difficult exactly. Nothing's changed since the last time we were together."

Nothing, except Angelique's understanding. She looked at him for a long moment, as if weighing something very carefully. Then, in a quiet voice, she said, "I don't want to be afraid of the possibility every time we're together."

Kersen's eyes widened a little. "Oh no Angelique, you don't have to be. I would never bite someone without consent. I have a great deal of self control. You didn't think anything was wrong last time, did you?"

"No, the last time was... well, an utter delight. Fun. You're a wonder," Angelique told him with a small smile, touching Kersen's cheek, wishing she could ease that startled look away from his beautiful eyes.

"What I mean is, I will always be wondering. Worried, I think, that you... well, that there's something you could have, something you want, that I'm too frightened to give you. I don't want that. I think... I'd like to know what it feels like, just so I know." Her smile turned a touch crooked, self-effacing. "I said I wanted to know all of you, didn't I?"

"Well, but..." Kersen still looked unsure. "But not if you're frightened. I wasn't trying to make you think you should..."

Before Kersen could finish his sentence, Angelique leaned in, and kissed him. It was gentle, but silencing, and all too short. Just enough to reassure him that she was confident in her desires.

"I didn't mean that I was afraid of you," Angelique said quietly when the kiss broke. "I know you, and I know you would never hurt me. If anything, I'm afraid of not knowing. Of always wondering if you'd be happier if you could... taste me."

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